Early in my discovery of the foundational lies Mormonism is built upon, I remember struggling to wrap my brain around the new concept that the church was not true. This alternative world view was as unbelievable to me as if I had witnessed the Sun rising in the West. I remember many dark and depressing weeks as my mind tried to deny the undeniable and make the adjustment to this new reality…what many of us refer to as the “Matrix Effect”, the act of wakening from a false reality. During this difficult and painful time…I kept fighting my birth to non-belief. I would come to a decision then go back and reexamine my conclusions…I never wanted the Church to NOT be true.
During one of my many attempts at re-examining Mormon truth claims…I read a post (on another board) from Tal Bachman. In his post, Tal made, what for me was a very crystal clear statement ... that sent shivers down my spine. He stated, “The church is NOT what it claims to be…” . Even today I don’t know why this statement affected me as it did, but those 9 simple words were like a catalyst in my mind. It took my fussy blurry world into sharp focus. I had been struggling to accept that the “Church was NOT True”…but by merely viewing the Church as NOT what it claimed to be…everything became perfectly clear. Why this made any difference for me I do not know. I even sent Tal an email asking him to explain what exactly he meant by saying that the church is not what it claims to be…his reply was something like…”ah dude, what exactly don’t you understand? (probably thinking...you dumb ass) The church makes many claims about being the only true church on the face of the earth, on having living prophet that speak directly with God, that they have another witness of Jesus Christ, the Book of Mormon, ect ect ect…they are NOT what they claim to be…get it?
The light bulb in my mind turned on…and the darkness of my recurring conflicts disappeared… I moved from struggling doubter…to skeptical thinker… almost in an instant…yeah I got it.
The church is NOT what it claims to be…became the most powerful of power statements in my journey out of the grips of Mormonism. It truly set my mind free…